Angel

To Maggie,

Will you smile after all this? Will you smile like before after I leave?

… …

I met with her two years ago, we sit in the same room. We had few words at that times, not because I couldn’t speak, we just shared little time or space. But there are some things I know for sure, she smiles a lot, she is lovely and I like her.

I don’t remember when it started, we began to talk a little bit. I want to thank her roommate, who sits in another room, she wanted her to be a messenger, because her roommate had a thing for me. I’m sorry but I have to say I never cared about her roommate inside. Maybe I faked sometimes, that’s all because I could spend more time with her, my angel.

The feelings for her become even much stronger since I knew that I’m going to leave this city, which I’ve lived in for seven years. But I don’t know how to express, maybe it’s the best to hide it from the first and just far watch the most beautiful scene in the world, angel smiling.

She has feelings for me, which makes me nervous and careful. I don’t want hard feelings in the end, I just want her to be happy all the time, I don’t want to see her lonely, I just want her to be loved.

The mistake has been made. I was a little drunk but completely sobered in mind. Now she knows my feelings and I know her thoughts. We will end up with nothing, which we both understand from the very beginning. My precious angel, can you take this? Will you cry? I intended to be a silent guardian but I failed.

Your smile is the most beautiful thing I can see in my life. I just can’t describe in words how much I love your smile. Do you know how touching and heart-warming your smile is? Can you feel that yourself? Every time you smile, I just can’t move my sight away. Is this what magic is? I feel happy, warm and cheered-up. It makes me feel that I’m freshly alive, full of energy and passion.

My heart melts.

… …

Forgive me, baby, forgive me for not being able to control my feelings, forgive me for not being able to stay by your side.

I’m sure you’ll be happy for the rest of your life. There must be some other guy feeling the same about you like me. He will be moved by your smile, he will love you with all his heart, he will give you all happiness in life. He will be the luckiest man in the world and you will be the happiest woman.

I’ll start a new life in a strange city, pursuing a good future and looking for true meaning of life. And you, my angel, will bravely move forward, smiling like always, to embrace beautiful life.

Take care and be happy!

Loving you forever.

Alex.